In this afternoon’s meeting with the oncology team I will likely discover the reasoning behind my new treatment programme and more detail about it. I will probe gently to get an idea of the different strands of discussion that allowed the multi-disciplinary team meeting to come to their conclusions. I will have a clear idea of the new regime of chemotherapy and as to whether it will include the trial drug bevacizumab. I can then move on to tomorrow’s meeting with radiotherapy to discuss and learn about that treatment.
In some ways all of this is slightly irrelevant as, whilst acknowledging that the treatment is crucial to my recovery, I am also starting to feel that the only person who can pull me out of this disease is me. If my body is still willing then the treatment, the force of my will and the love and support that I am gratefully receiving will combine to release me from the disease.
The standard treatment has failed to get the cancer under control, so that makes me realise that the odds have moved considerably against me but I am acutely aware that it is the individual not the odds that is important ultimately.
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