Today when I was told that I would get a scan at the beginning of November I wasn't clear exactly what the purpose of the scan was i.e. I wasn't clear whether the purpose of the scan was to confirm that the treatment had worked or whether it was an intermediary scan.
Don't get me wrong, I did ask the question but I didn't receive straightforward answers.
Although I don't know I don't really care. The reason is that if I enter the succeeding meeting knowing that it is Emperor Nero time (thumbs up or thumbs down) then the whole meeting becomes like contestants in the
X-Factor where they have a long walk to face Simon Cowell before being told "I'm taking you through" or "I am sorry but you haven't made it".
There is always a clue for good or bad news in these meetings though. The presence of the Cancer Nurse signals bad news, so you know when you walk through the door anyway.
It's still a tough time at the moment with little energy, lots of pain and an inability to eat, so it continues to be nose to the grindstone and hope for good news.
I know one thing for sure, if I get through this then I have paid my dues. The first part of the journey through chemotherapy was a "cake-walk". This latter part of the journey has been a long hard haul.
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