Return of the Aum

I had a jolly lunch with the Wanderer.  He is off to France on Friday to start learning french in advance of the ski season. Good luck with that one, I am sure that it will pay dividends later this winter.

On my way to our lunch I was plugged into my iPod listening to the "Aum". 

When I was first diagnosed, nearly nine months ago, I spent a lot of time when commuting and walking listening to this repetitive chant and I find it useful in creating a paradoxical environment where the mind is both relaxed an focused.  Having a singular but relaxed focus helps to strip away the noise and is very soothing.  It takes the mind back to basics.

As I was walking and listening to the Aum the Hindu god Ganesha came to mind, like as if I was walking to the station with a big Ganesha behind me!  Ganesha is the elephant headed god and is is a common image that most will have seen.  I know a little of Hindu philosophy, mostly related to the mythology of the gods, but I was not aware that Ganesha is directly associated with the sound of the Aum.
The extract below from Wikipedia is enlightening.

Ganesha is identified with the Hindu mantra Aum (ॐ, also called Om). The term oṃkārasvarūpa (Aum is his form), when identified with Ganesha, refers to the notion that he personifies the primal sound.^[93] The Ganapati Atharvashirsa attests to this association.

Ganesha is associated with obstacles, both of a physical and spiritual nature; he is worshipped as a remover of obstacles though traditionally he also places obstacles in the path of those who need to be checked.

It is odd how the mind makes these associations apparently spontaneously but, most likely, I have seen this association in the past but it has not registered with me.


The major obstacles that face me at this stage are fear and my body's ability to take enough from the treatment to heal itself.  Back in those spring days what faced me was somewhat different.  The likely path of chemotherapy / operation / chemotherapy / cure was a bit like jumping out of an aeroplane with a parachute having received full training.

What I am faced with now is a bit like jumping out of an aeroplane with a parachute that is known to be faulty.  It may bring me gently back to earth or I may go head first into the ground at 120 mph.

Listening to the Aum isn't going to change the scenario and it is only one of many things that I do to occupy and calm myself.  Ironically, the day to day issues of pain and eating difficulties help me to stay focused in the present and not worry about the future.

All of that helps me to feel that when the ripcord is pulled there is still a good chance of a positive outcome, even if there is a bit of a bumpy landing.