Where to from here

Having lifted myself out of the toughest bit of the radiotherapy I now feel like I am going backwards a little.

I took Wednesday and Thursday off sick but I don't feel any better for it.

Part of my problem is waking up in the middle of the night hungry.  The lack of solid foods makes it impossible to feel full and when I wake up I have a raging hunger which I have to get up and feed.  As eating takes a long time it makes a big hole in my sleep and I have always needed a good night's sleep.

I am still having to manage my activity and tomorrow presents an example of how I have to think ahead.  Notoplip and I are taking our boys to see Chelsea vs Wolves in the afternoon and, if I feel like I do today, I will have to skip Huffty's football match in the morning.

I can't grumble too much because I am active and not slumped on the sofa, but my lack of progress over the last week is in contrast to the good progress that I made in the previous two weeks.

What I am finding to be one of the biggest issues about coping with a major illness is the simple fact that you have no idea how things will progress.  It is just a case of feeling your way.  There is nothing suprising in that statement but I am in no-man's land right now and sometimes patience is hard.

There is no doubt that the spirit is tested in these circumtances, but I refuse to be found wanting in that department