This is the story about my journey into and, hopefully, through cancer of the oesophagus. There are number of reasons for me wishing to share my experience; some of which are selfish, some of which I would like to think are altruistic. The blog is intended to be a frank account and, whilst I hope it is accessible and useful beyond my immediate circle of family and friends, it will be written in a style that is suitable for open-minded adults.
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Thursday, 31 March 2011
Thank You
I just wanted to say thank ou to everyone who has sent their well wishes, kind words and thoughts. The children and I take each day as it comes. Some are good and some not so great. As a family we all grieve differently, sometimes together and sometimes on our own. Children grieve so very differently to adults and our two show their sorrow in their own individual way. We talk and share our thoughts all the time. We share our tears and laughter. Swordfish was an amazing person with a huge peronality and we are able to share so many stories and memories; these help with those sad moments. I recently had my birthday and that had moments of incredible sorrow but we managed to have a super day out together. So many friends have donated to the hospice that took great care of Swordfish - thank you so very much. The doctors and nurses there are very special people. I have been asked to give the Just Giving link; a friend of our is cycling from London to Paris and asked if he could ride in memory of Swordfish and donate the sponsorship to the hospice. The link www.justgiving.com/justin-dennis39 Think good thoughts every day dear friends xx
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Dear Kitten and children
ReplyDeleteGlad you were able to celebrate your recent birthday with the children and your special friends. You and the children are in my thoughts daily and I hope you will be able to enjoy life fully once again in the near future. I know that would be the wishes of your dear Swordfish.
Love to you all
from Lindylu
xxx
Hi Kitten
ReplyDeleteIt is such a beautiful day here in the West Country, the flowers are blooming and the trees are turning green, I was just thinking of you all and hoping that you can still find the beauty in all this.
And then I thought of course she can because through all of this she has shown such an amazing spirit and resolve.
Always remember kitten that breath of Spring air, that white feather in the garden, the moment when you feel someone standing behind you, it's him and he loves you still.
Changeling x
Hi
ReplyDeleteI am sure that charitable thoughts have been on many minds here - although it can often be difficult to open dialogue on that front - especially between "strangers". I am glad that your friend is doing this, I am sure the donations will be generous! My other half ran the London Marathon in memory of her mother a few years back and we did a lot of work on the sponsorship for that - we will hope to do well again in this case!
All the very best
"Jegersmart"
Kitten,
ReplyDeleteYou may no longer receive the volume of words but I know that the volume of feeling is still very much there. I like so many think of you often and hope that day by day life becomes a little more bearable and time does the job it's so good at, healing.
Enjoy the sunshine because we all know who is behind it....
Kindest regards
Diana
Hi Kitten
ReplyDeleteJust wondering how you are all doing?
I do check for new postings every now and then. It would be nice if people could leave a comment now and then in honour of Swordfish.
My dad very sadly passed away recently, he travelled the same path as Swordfish, I miss him terribly and I often think of you and your children.
Best Wishes Sue x
Kitten,
ReplyDeleteI always knew that swordfish (AKA Barc's Rumps) had an amazing inner strength which was visible to all on the Barclays BB. He was one of the few I could rely on with regards to intergrity on the iii bbs.
Coming across Rumps on the iii bbs has touched and changed me in a way difficult to put here
Having read your blogs as well, it is also obvious he also drew most of that inner strength from a strong supporting family from you especially (and the kids) and thats a credit to you during these tough times
I can't pretend to know or feel what you or anyone who has gone through especially during these difficult past months. Rest assured that your continued determination is inspiring to all
Best wishes
stopthismadness (stm) (from the barc bb)
I just had a "Swordfish moment" and thought I would check the blog.
ReplyDeleteThinking of the 3 of you Kitten.
love Mark xoxo
Hey Kitten,
ReplyDeleteI hope you are bearing up well, sometimes it's hard to believe the hurt turns into loving fond memories, but it does. Love can't be replaced by hurt, not for long anyway.
Keep us all updated on the plan to climb Cader Idris, Rumps had a very positive effect on me via the iii boards and although my job can be a tough one to get away from I would like to pay my respects if it is at all possible.
Best Regards,
Fox
Hello Sue
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear that your father died. I feel every sympathy for you & your family. I can understand how you may be feeling at the moment as Swordfish was my brother.
Best wishes
Tricky crow.
Hi Tricky Crow
ReplyDeleteHow really lovely of you to send me this message.
I found this blog quite some time ago when I was searching for information about stents. At the time it was (i cant find the right words) helpful to read Swordfish's words, and reading through the blog, it was like reading the history of what had happened to my Dad to that date. Obviously I don't know any of you, but over the days and weeks I began to realise what a special person Swordfish was, he was truly inspirational. I can imagine what a terrible hole he has left in your family and in your hearts. I miss my Dad so much, he was also an inspirational man and he played a huge part in our family life.
Its difficult to understand how this feels and the effects it has on you on a daily basis isn't it.
I had no idea about this type of cancer until my Dad was diagnosed, it is a very cruel illness, and my Dad like Swordfish coped with it and dealt with it in the most brave way, it makes me cry when I think about it.
I dont know how you are all coping, I know my family and I have some good days and some bad days. We do try and focus on the good memories, but sometimes it just all gets the better of you doesn't it.
I cant tell you how lovely it is to get your message. I think about your family often, and Swordfish really touched my heart.
Very best wishes Sue
Hi Kitten and the rest of Swordfish's family.
ReplyDeleteI too, like another poster had that moment! I often think of you all especially on a sunny day or when I see that white feather and think of my lovely sister who also died far too young. I hope you are all coping, you must miss him dreadfully.
I just wanted you to know that we do still think of you all and pass on our love and very best wishes.
Changeling xx
Hi Kitten - Just wanted to say that we are still thinking of you and hope you are all ok.
ReplyDeletePlease give our love to the whole clan.
Ibanez & Family
Hi Kitten,
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to let you know that we have been thinking about you and the children recently. Swordfish was a very special person.
Big hugs
J, R, W, & M (ex WPU7's)
Just a little thought of you came to my mind today when someone mentioned those beautiful Welsh mountains. I do hope you manage to make that pilgrimage when time allows. I can think of nothing more peaceful than to gather your thoughts in a place of fond memories.
ReplyDeleteI see you still have friends who keep you company on here when possible, long may it continue, the love for a good friend never dies it just blends into life but words need to be revived from time to time to show he is not forgotten which is why this board needs to be kept open for as long as you feel the need.
With kind thoughts.
Dinamite.