One of the key foci for the coming weeks has to be that after the operation I will be "inactive" for quite some time.
There will be no barrelling through like chemotherapy where I am able to function, albeit at a "lower frequency". The inevitability of this change brings different aspects of my life more sharply into view.
Perhaps the most significant aspect is the time I spend with my children, both as and individual and as a whole family with Kitten.
Our children understand as much as is reasonable for their age and like all children they will adjust and be resilient. Regardless of that I have a need to get the most that I can out of them of in the coming weeks and I hope that they have good times with me "before the shit hits the fan".
This weekend I took Huffty out on his own for the Chelsea stadium tour that was postponed from his birthday last weekend. It is good to do things as a family but when you have only one of the children you do not have to manage the dynamic between them, which is disruptive.
Today, I took Boogle ice-skating and that time is in someways more valuable. Kicking a ball around the garden is easy to do with your son and it is engaging and interactive, whereas there are arguably less activities in which I can engage my daughter. Whilst, I used to think nothing of joining in with her bouncing on the trampoline (one of her favoured activities) I am less inclined to at the moment.
As a dad it is easy for the imagination to be less rigourously applied to your family life than it is to be applied to your work and leisure, now is not the time for that.
Sunday, 30 May 2010
At the Junction - back to the analysis
With my pre-operation course of chemotherapy due to end on Wednesday morning so my pre-operative stage will begin on the same day with a CT scan. This article has an analytical slant towards my current postion and I will be writing on my emotional and mental state separately. I feel that it is worth documenting my thoughts from both perspectives because I have come to a crossroads in my treatment where I will discover how far I have come since initial diagnosis.
The tone of the article is "back to business" because this week is one for me to take seriously but within my stride, regardless of what information comes my way.
Whilst I analysed many of the issues that were central to the diagnostic phase I did not delve deeply into the dynamics of surgery because I thought that it was an issue best left to a more appropriate time. There is only so much information that I think is good to take on both from an emotional and a mental stand point.
If we stick to basics, I was diagnosed as having a "regional tumour" i.e. it has grown through the oesophageal wall and has infected the local lymph nodes but has not metastasised to other organs in the body (i.e. there is no secondary cancer). The tumour has been staged as T3, N1, M0 - where T is the size from 0 to 4, N is the nodal infection gauged from N0 to N3 and M indicates the presence of metastasis either M0 or M1.
The following artical describes the classifications more fully (remember that I have the second type of cancer listed "adenocarcinoma"). Oesophageal Cancer Staging . So my cancer was at an advanced stage when diagnosed though, critically not metastatic.
Spinning to the bottom of the linked page a harsh truth is articulated and that is that, for the statisical sample that was taken, people with my level of cancer have a 20% chance of surviving for more than five years. I believe that these statistics were derived before the type of treatment I am having was in situ but, but whilst the reading still isn't pretty, I believe it to be closer to a 30% survival rate for 5 or more years. It should also remember that I am having the "wonder drug" Avastin, so it remains to be seen what impact that has.
There is a another factor, which is termed as metabolic resoponse. Metabolic "responders" have a much higher survival rate than non-responders. What I don't understand is whether I have been tested in this respect. From what I have read, metabolic response is determined by a PET scan a couple of weeks after the start of chemotherapy, but as my PET scan was performed before chemotherapy I assume that my metabolic response was not measured. That is something that I will ask.
Now base line statistics are always good to absorb because they tell you the wider picture and let you know where you are "operating from". However, it would also be a good argument to say that it is unwise to delve into this kind of information and just assume that you are going to be ok.
As I work as analyst my view point is to digest the statistics and information that is out there (and there is plenty of it) and then use it to your advantage.
There are many key factors to survival rates and these include how you respond to the initial phases or treatment, how much of the cancer can be removed at the time of operation, your general health, the quality of your care and your attitude are all good examples of factors that affect the equation. Given that I have a leading oncologist, surgeon, good general health, I am relatively young and that I am focused on returning to health, I believe that I have a lot going for me in this current predicament. The fact that blood counts related to the tumour were considered to be moving in my favour significantly is also a positive consideration.
The ability to remove all of the tumour is critical, as the following chart illustrates. R0 represents complete removal
The difference between R0 and R1 quite compelling. It should be recognised that the chart is not exclusively for my stage of cancer.
Regardless of any of the above the CT scan on Wednesday will present a picture of where I am now. Whilst I was diagnosed as having a stage III tumour we will know how well I have responded to the chemotheraphy and the surgeon will presumably have an idea (though I would imagine not definitive) of how successful surgery will be.
The CT scan will provide some hard facts, so by Friday I expect to be able to reset my expectations in a pragmatic way, whilst retaining my belief that there is much I can do to influence the outcome of my own journey.
My simple take on my situation has always been that if my "inner battery" is beyond recharging then it will fail; nature will dictate that. If it can be juiced up then I will succeed.
I don't need any motivation because my young family provides as much as I need and reservoir beyond that I can always dip into emotionally.
The tone of the article is "back to business" because this week is one for me to take seriously but within my stride, regardless of what information comes my way.
Whilst I analysed many of the issues that were central to the diagnostic phase I did not delve deeply into the dynamics of surgery because I thought that it was an issue best left to a more appropriate time. There is only so much information that I think is good to take on both from an emotional and a mental stand point.
If we stick to basics, I was diagnosed as having a "regional tumour" i.e. it has grown through the oesophageal wall and has infected the local lymph nodes but has not metastasised to other organs in the body (i.e. there is no secondary cancer). The tumour has been staged as T3, N1, M0 - where T is the size from 0 to 4, N is the nodal infection gauged from N0 to N3 and M indicates the presence of metastasis either M0 or M1.
The following artical describes the classifications more fully (remember that I have the second type of cancer listed "adenocarcinoma"). Oesophageal Cancer Staging . So my cancer was at an advanced stage when diagnosed though, critically not metastatic.
Spinning to the bottom of the linked page a harsh truth is articulated and that is that, for the statisical sample that was taken, people with my level of cancer have a 20% chance of surviving for more than five years. I believe that these statistics were derived before the type of treatment I am having was in situ but, but whilst the reading still isn't pretty, I believe it to be closer to a 30% survival rate for 5 or more years. It should also remember that I am having the "wonder drug" Avastin, so it remains to be seen what impact that has.
There is a another factor, which is termed as metabolic resoponse. Metabolic "responders" have a much higher survival rate than non-responders. What I don't understand is whether I have been tested in this respect. From what I have read, metabolic response is determined by a PET scan a couple of weeks after the start of chemotherapy, but as my PET scan was performed before chemotherapy I assume that my metabolic response was not measured. That is something that I will ask.
Now base line statistics are always good to absorb because they tell you the wider picture and let you know where you are "operating from". However, it would also be a good argument to say that it is unwise to delve into this kind of information and just assume that you are going to be ok.
As I work as analyst my view point is to digest the statistics and information that is out there (and there is plenty of it) and then use it to your advantage.
There are many key factors to survival rates and these include how you respond to the initial phases or treatment, how much of the cancer can be removed at the time of operation, your general health, the quality of your care and your attitude are all good examples of factors that affect the equation. Given that I have a leading oncologist, surgeon, good general health, I am relatively young and that I am focused on returning to health, I believe that I have a lot going for me in this current predicament. The fact that blood counts related to the tumour were considered to be moving in my favour significantly is also a positive consideration.
The ability to remove all of the tumour is critical, as the following chart illustrates. R0 represents complete removal
The difference between R0 and R1 quite compelling. It should be recognised that the chart is not exclusively for my stage of cancer.
Regardless of any of the above the CT scan on Wednesday will present a picture of where I am now. Whilst I was diagnosed as having a stage III tumour we will know how well I have responded to the chemotheraphy and the surgeon will presumably have an idea (though I would imagine not definitive) of how successful surgery will be.
The CT scan will provide some hard facts, so by Friday I expect to be able to reset my expectations in a pragmatic way, whilst retaining my belief that there is much I can do to influence the outcome of my own journey.
My simple take on my situation has always been that if my "inner battery" is beyond recharging then it will fail; nature will dictate that. If it can be juiced up then I will succeed.
I don't need any motivation because my young family provides as much as I need and reservoir beyond that I can always dip into emotionally.
Saturday, 29 May 2010
Focus on Fitness
After visiting the gym on Tuesday, I decided to go for a run on Thursday lunchtime. Nothing demanding, just gentle jog for just over a mile; or so I thought.
I ran the gentle incline up my road for about 300 yards and felt quite easy. Then the shutters came down. Within 30 seconds I was breathless, so I slowed down and realised that I wasn't going anywhere far. So, I walked for a few yards then jogged very gently back home.
The next day was another day, and I am not one to take defeat lightly, so I took the first train to work and went straight to the gym.
I am not a fan of early morning training but by 7:30 I was on the treadmill, but this time a very gentle start and built it up. I only aimed for a mile and by the last quarter of a mile "lap" was running at a good pace. I did 10 minutes after on the elliptical trainer and was pleased with myself. It was a good start.
I want to get myself to a good level of fitness within the next 6 or 7 week, but I realise that it won't come easily and I will have to be crafty. I have started finding "little pockets" to do exercise like jogging when I go to the shop, so that I am taking small opportunities to build a bigger picture.
I am also still doing the Chi Kung but I am increasing the time. You may be surprised to know that standing still can be quite demanding. The slight bending of the legs creates a dynamic tension which build over time. It is my version of "morning yoga", healthy for the mind and body and insistent on creating an aura of relaxation
I ran the gentle incline up my road for about 300 yards and felt quite easy. Then the shutters came down. Within 30 seconds I was breathless, so I slowed down and realised that I wasn't going anywhere far. So, I walked for a few yards then jogged very gently back home.
The next day was another day, and I am not one to take defeat lightly, so I took the first train to work and went straight to the gym.
I am not a fan of early morning training but by 7:30 I was on the treadmill, but this time a very gentle start and built it up. I only aimed for a mile and by the last quarter of a mile "lap" was running at a good pace. I did 10 minutes after on the elliptical trainer and was pleased with myself. It was a good start.
I want to get myself to a good level of fitness within the next 6 or 7 week, but I realise that it won't come easily and I will have to be crafty. I have started finding "little pockets" to do exercise like jogging when I go to the shop, so that I am taking small opportunities to build a bigger picture.
I am also still doing the Chi Kung but I am increasing the time. You may be surprised to know that standing still can be quite demanding. The slight bending of the legs creates a dynamic tension which build over time. It is my version of "morning yoga", healthy for the mind and body and insistent on creating an aura of relaxation
Thursday, 27 May 2010
Taking Care of the Children
Yesterday we managed to catch the last hour of the local theme park after the children had finished school. That is the benefit of having annual passes.
Doing it this way we were able to more or less "walk onto" rides and have multiple goes. Huffty was especially pleased because he was adjudged to have just reached the required 1.2 metres to go on a very good rollercoaster. Boogle has been going on it since she was just turned 5, because she is tall for age. Anyway, I had to side on it twice on the trot and then three times on the spin (literally).
The point is that life is pretty normal and that is reflected by my coming work agenda looking pretty hectic.
This afternoon also revolved around the kids as we took them to see the child psychologist that Kitten and I have visited twice before at the Royal Marsden.
I feel that everything is operating well in the family. Sure it is sometimes difficult and there are occasional flashpoints but we talk things through and keep learning and improving and are doing fine.
So why go? Simply because we feel that we are getting benefit from the visits. That can be said of today where the children were able to say how they feel to a sympathetic but impartial ear, whilst still being in a family situation.
We have our next appointment scheduled for the 24th of June, so this is not an intrusive exercise and, for what it is worth, the psychologist said that she is very impressed with how we are doing.
Doing it this way we were able to more or less "walk onto" rides and have multiple goes. Huffty was especially pleased because he was adjudged to have just reached the required 1.2 metres to go on a very good rollercoaster. Boogle has been going on it since she was just turned 5, because she is tall for age. Anyway, I had to side on it twice on the trot and then three times on the spin (literally).
The point is that life is pretty normal and that is reflected by my coming work agenda looking pretty hectic.
This afternoon also revolved around the kids as we took them to see the child psychologist that Kitten and I have visited twice before at the Royal Marsden.
I feel that everything is operating well in the family. Sure it is sometimes difficult and there are occasional flashpoints but we talk things through and keep learning and improving and are doing fine.
So why go? Simply because we feel that we are getting benefit from the visits. That can be said of today where the children were able to say how they feel to a sympathetic but impartial ear, whilst still being in a family situation.
We have our next appointment scheduled for the 24th of June, so this is not an intrusive exercise and, for what it is worth, the psychologist said that she is very impressed with how we are doing.
Wednesday, 26 May 2010
What the "Fox" that about?
Entering the world of chemotherapy was unchartered territory and I decided to tackle it on a day by day basis. The bedroom was spruced up with much good will from my friends and it has proved a good place for me to work from home in peace and quiet. Fortunately it has not been called on much for enforced rest. I guess that comes into place post operation.
No matter how much you read, or how much anecdotal input you have, the effects of chemotherapy are, at some level, unique to the individual and require an individual approach.
I gave myself a concrete structure to work in, broken down into day components and used that as a framework to relax into.
It has been of benefit in easing me through the phase. The next cycles to commence around the end of September may be a completely different challenge.
The Poem is called "The Magus" or "The Magician"
The cunning fox knows not rules
Guilt is food only for fools
Do morals feed its hunger?
The wily fox must scavenge and plunder
Walking the tightrope everyday
The sleight of hand is its natural way
Mr Fox is a better narrator than me
The concept of the poem is simple and can be encapuslated in the phrase "Needs must when the devil rides". The fox is opportunist because it does what it has to in order to get by. It is mercurial and "fleet of foot" in its thinking, taking advantage of every opportunity that comes its way with its practised craft. It does so without discerning right from wrong; without the baggage of conscience.
That's a magical way and it's living a day at a time, a simple way to approach unchartered waters
No matter how much you read, or how much anecdotal input you have, the effects of chemotherapy are, at some level, unique to the individual and require an individual approach.
I gave myself a concrete structure to work in, broken down into day components and used that as a framework to relax into.
It has been of benefit in easing me through the phase. The next cycles to commence around the end of September may be a completely different challenge.
The Poem is called "The Magus" or "The Magician"
The cunning fox knows not rules
Guilt is food only for fools
Do morals feed its hunger?
The wily fox must scavenge and plunder
Walking the tightrope everyday
The sleight of hand is its natural way
Mr Fox is a better narrator than me
The concept of the poem is simple and can be encapuslated in the phrase "Needs must when the devil rides". The fox is opportunist because it does what it has to in order to get by. It is mercurial and "fleet of foot" in its thinking, taking advantage of every opportunity that comes its way with its practised craft. It does so without discerning right from wrong; without the baggage of conscience.
That's a magical way and it's living a day at a time, a simple way to approach unchartered waters
Yesterday
"All my troubles seemed so far away"...da...da...da..
Yesterday, was a good day for me because I did get down to the gym for the first time since I began treatment. Since treatment started I have been ice-skating a couple of times but I haven't had any regular exercise structure.
My trip to the gym will be the start of plenty of exercise between now and the operation and I came through it comfortably. I only did 15 minutes aerobic exercise (on the elliptical trainer) and at levels that I would consider to be "warm up", but it was enough to test me. I did a little weights too.
The main benefit was pyschological.
The other significant part of the day was the meeting the ex-MD for drinks. It was good to catch up and it was also good to spend the evening in the pub.
Apart from the fact that we all had an enjoyable evening what is worth documenting is that when someone hasn't seen you for a while and they know you have cancer it is often the case that they expect you to look ravaged by the disease. In my case that simply isn't so. I say this before the trials and tribulations of the op.
I lost weight in the autumn / winter in a controlled fashion and then put on some in an advised (but uncontrolled fashion), so my shape isn't how I like it, but I look healthy but just with a damned short hair cut. My eyes and demeanour are clear and have probably benefited from my near abstinence from alchohol.
Given that I had a two of heavy nights out in December and a few glasses of wine over Christmas, I haven't drank regularly since I started training at the beginning of last September. This year my entire consumption of alcohol is 3 glasses of wine and 2 bottles of beer and that despite not being diagnosed until February. The point being that it won't have done my system any harm being away from it.
I was asked whether it was difficult to sit in the pub whilst not drinking but, I have detoxed before and have good discipline. In 1999 I did a 3 month detox without any alcohol but also including many systematic dietary changes, in 2000I did it again and in 2000 I did six months, so I have no difficulty in applying myself. Once I decide to do something I generally see it through.
In the current situation there is no "alcohol" ban either by me or even suggested by the hospital, I just think it makes sense to let my liver and kidneys get on with what they should be doing, which is processing the chemotherapy drugs. If someone asked me to have a single drink to celebrate something then I would join in, but I can't see myself drinking a session either pre or post op.
Whilst it has not been suggest that I have arrived at this place because of booze or bad habits I think that I have done enough of that in my life and will have other priorities when I come through this.
On the other hand, did someone mention a party if and when I get the all clear :-)
Yesterday, was a good day for me because I did get down to the gym for the first time since I began treatment. Since treatment started I have been ice-skating a couple of times but I haven't had any regular exercise structure.
My trip to the gym will be the start of plenty of exercise between now and the operation and I came through it comfortably. I only did 15 minutes aerobic exercise (on the elliptical trainer) and at levels that I would consider to be "warm up", but it was enough to test me. I did a little weights too.
The main benefit was pyschological.
The other significant part of the day was the meeting the ex-MD for drinks. It was good to catch up and it was also good to spend the evening in the pub.
Apart from the fact that we all had an enjoyable evening what is worth documenting is that when someone hasn't seen you for a while and they know you have cancer it is often the case that they expect you to look ravaged by the disease. In my case that simply isn't so. I say this before the trials and tribulations of the op.
I lost weight in the autumn / winter in a controlled fashion and then put on some in an advised (but uncontrolled fashion), so my shape isn't how I like it, but I look healthy but just with a damned short hair cut. My eyes and demeanour are clear and have probably benefited from my near abstinence from alchohol.
Given that I had a two of heavy nights out in December and a few glasses of wine over Christmas, I haven't drank regularly since I started training at the beginning of last September. This year my entire consumption of alcohol is 3 glasses of wine and 2 bottles of beer and that despite not being diagnosed until February. The point being that it won't have done my system any harm being away from it.
I was asked whether it was difficult to sit in the pub whilst not drinking but, I have detoxed before and have good discipline. In 1999 I did a 3 month detox without any alcohol but also including many systematic dietary changes, in 2000I did it again and in 2000 I did six months, so I have no difficulty in applying myself. Once I decide to do something I generally see it through.
In the current situation there is no "alcohol" ban either by me or even suggested by the hospital, I just think it makes sense to let my liver and kidneys get on with what they should be doing, which is processing the chemotherapy drugs. If someone asked me to have a single drink to celebrate something then I would join in, but I can't see myself drinking a session either pre or post op.
Whilst it has not been suggest that I have arrived at this place because of booze or bad habits I think that I have done enough of that in my life and will have other priorities when I come through this.
On the other hand, did someone mention a party if and when I get the all clear :-)
Tuesday, 25 May 2010
Gym and Tonic
Last week I removed the temporary suspension of my gym membership and will be paying my first visit today.
Having lapsed a little on the Chi Kung I am also back doing that regularly and the idea is to get fit and "centered" before taking on the surgery and the ensuing lay up.
Talking of the Chi Kung, I was on my way out into the back garden today when I saw a squirrel on the fence by the back door. If you recall my Close Encounters of the Squirrel Kind you will understand that I had a flashback at this point. At this exact moment I felt something furry pass over my foot. It was just the cat but the timing was immaculate and made me jump out of my skin.
The back garden was a hive of activity and because I am just standing still it invites nature to be closer. Today it was a wood pigeon perched not far from me and there also seems to be resident starling in the garden. Stalins also have a distinctive call.
Anyway, Kitten joined a gym last week and yesterday was her first visit. She seems to have an enthusiasm for it, so we will both be regulars She will be training at a gym close to home whereas I will be training in London when I am in the office.
Speaking of the office, there are drinks with our ex Managing Director this evening so I will be popping out to see him. He has just spent his second entire season skiing, so I am sure that he won't be short of a tale or two.
It will be good to be out of the house, in what is a local and homely pub.
Having lapsed a little on the Chi Kung I am also back doing that regularly and the idea is to get fit and "centered" before taking on the surgery and the ensuing lay up.
Talking of the Chi Kung, I was on my way out into the back garden today when I saw a squirrel on the fence by the back door. If you recall my Close Encounters of the Squirrel Kind you will understand that I had a flashback at this point. At this exact moment I felt something furry pass over my foot. It was just the cat but the timing was immaculate and made me jump out of my skin.
The back garden was a hive of activity and because I am just standing still it invites nature to be closer. Today it was a wood pigeon perched not far from me and there also seems to be resident starling in the garden. Stalins also have a distinctive call.
Anyway, Kitten joined a gym last week and yesterday was her first visit. She seems to have an enthusiasm for it, so we will both be regulars She will be training at a gym close to home whereas I will be training in London when I am in the office.
Speaking of the office, there are drinks with our ex Managing Director this evening so I will be popping out to see him. He has just spent his second entire season skiing, so I am sure that he won't be short of a tale or two.
It will be good to be out of the house, in what is a local and homely pub.
Monday, 24 May 2010
Nearly There with the Chemotherapy
It dawned on me today that there are only eight days left of the final chemotherapy cycle before surgery.
At this point it is always a doddle, but there is still need for care to be taken. One of the good things is that I have finished the five blood boosting injections from days 8 to 12. This is an under the skin injection (subcutaneous) rather than intravenous but it is something that you have to get on with rather than enjoy.
I am restaged with a CT scan the day after the chemotherapy finishes and that is when I will find out how well the drugs have worked.
I was chatting it over with Kitten tonight and although I want the tumour to have shrunk the most important thing is that everything is still operable.
What nobody knows is what the rate of the tumour's growth was before treatment started, so it is unknown how much effort has been expended in reversing the situation.
Physically, there was a big improvement in my ability to swallow food after a few days of the first administration of chemotherapy but I cannot say that there has been an noticeable improvement from that point.
I am assuming that I won't know what the results of the CT scan are until two days after it is performed, as that is when I have an appointment scheduled to meet the surgeon.
Both Kitten and I are relaxed about the outcome and we are looking forward to our week's break in the Isle of Wight, whch is less than three weeks away.
On Thursday we visit the Marsden's child psychologist with the children (they haven't been with us on our two previous visits) and that should wrap things up. The kids are both back to their usual selves.
Huffty, is much more grown up than the beginning of the year as this has concided with him growing into his personality and Boogle is back to her feisty self but seems much more comfortable with my illness.
We undertook the visits to the psychologist simply because they were available and we wanted to do the best we could for the kids. They have been helpful and we have managed well as a family so far. The fact that Kitten had an operation on her neck last year will be helpful in laying the path for my operation as the situation will not be unique from the childrens' persepective.
Because my hair is shaved really tightly, the scar from my haemangioma operation is clearly visible. It is interesting that the kids have never commented on the scar before, given that even with hair covering the top part, the lower part of the scar runs below my ear along my neck in-line with my jaw.
Boogle noticed the scar from the top of my head to my ear, whilst we were sitting at the dinner table a few days ago, but she still did not connect that it runs down below the ear.
It is funny what kids see.
At this point it is always a doddle, but there is still need for care to be taken. One of the good things is that I have finished the five blood boosting injections from days 8 to 12. This is an under the skin injection (subcutaneous) rather than intravenous but it is something that you have to get on with rather than enjoy.
I am restaged with a CT scan the day after the chemotherapy finishes and that is when I will find out how well the drugs have worked.
I was chatting it over with Kitten tonight and although I want the tumour to have shrunk the most important thing is that everything is still operable.
What nobody knows is what the rate of the tumour's growth was before treatment started, so it is unknown how much effort has been expended in reversing the situation.
Physically, there was a big improvement in my ability to swallow food after a few days of the first administration of chemotherapy but I cannot say that there has been an noticeable improvement from that point.
I am assuming that I won't know what the results of the CT scan are until two days after it is performed, as that is when I have an appointment scheduled to meet the surgeon.
Both Kitten and I are relaxed about the outcome and we are looking forward to our week's break in the Isle of Wight, whch is less than three weeks away.
On Thursday we visit the Marsden's child psychologist with the children (they haven't been with us on our two previous visits) and that should wrap things up. The kids are both back to their usual selves.
Huffty, is much more grown up than the beginning of the year as this has concided with him growing into his personality and Boogle is back to her feisty self but seems much more comfortable with my illness.
We undertook the visits to the psychologist simply because they were available and we wanted to do the best we could for the kids. They have been helpful and we have managed well as a family so far. The fact that Kitten had an operation on her neck last year will be helpful in laying the path for my operation as the situation will not be unique from the childrens' persepective.
Because my hair is shaved really tightly, the scar from my haemangioma operation is clearly visible. It is interesting that the kids have never commented on the scar before, given that even with hair covering the top part, the lower part of the scar runs below my ear along my neck in-line with my jaw.
Boogle noticed the scar from the top of my head to my ear, whilst we were sitting at the dinner table a few days ago, but she still did not connect that it runs down below the ear.
It is funny what kids see.
Sunday, 23 May 2010
Mad Canadian and the Tinnitus
On Friday I paid another visit to the Canadian osteopath. I refer to him as the Mad Canadian not because of any measure of his behaviour but for his perspective on things both exoteric and esoteric. The fact that he queried the tag gave it the necessary "branding affirmation".
Before conisdering the merits of alternative approaches to a mainstream problem, or otherwise, it is worth acknowledging that I have been discussing the tinnitus with the Marsden and there is nothing that they can do about it. Their only weapon is in the selection of chemotherapy drugs in order to try and avoid its escalation.
I have had one prior visit to the osteopath for this purpose (my initial visit was for a back problem), which was during the last cycle of chemotherapy. I had limited expectations for treatment simply because the problem has been drug induced rather than of a physical root. The solitary visit did not remove the problem but there was a 50% reduction within a day.
Anyone who has suffered with tinnitus will know that it can be an uncomfortable experience so any improvement is welcome and a 50% improvement is significant.
My current visit has yielded similar results and I know have until the next cycle of chemotherapy starts to look for further improvements. That cycle will not start for 17-18 weeks, given that the current cycle has one and a half weeks to run the 6 weeks until the operation and 10 weeks recovery.
Treatment of the tinnitus is via cranial osteopathy but I always receive some standard osteopathy on my visits, which is a boon given the back problems I suffered a few weeks ago. I am now much more active than then so my back is in much better fettle generally.
The added benefit of my visits to the osteopath is that he has a wide range of experience of different treatment methods and there is substantial common ground outside the medical sphere. He is able to discuss the situation from a perspective close to mine. This offers a welcome and useful respite from the approach that I have adopted with my mainstream care, which is to educate and inform myself, so that I can have a decent conversation from their caring perspective. So, the visits have been useful in me consolidating my approach to the ever changing dynamics of situation. The overall well-being is something that is helpful in maintaining an optimistic outlook.
Whilst there is a clear cut route for me through the chemotherapy and operation each day is different and should be treated as such. My last two visits have coincided with the end of the first week of the cycle of treatment and have been of benefit in helping me out of the difficult period of the first seven days.
Before conisdering the merits of alternative approaches to a mainstream problem, or otherwise, it is worth acknowledging that I have been discussing the tinnitus with the Marsden and there is nothing that they can do about it. Their only weapon is in the selection of chemotherapy drugs in order to try and avoid its escalation.
I have had one prior visit to the osteopath for this purpose (my initial visit was for a back problem), which was during the last cycle of chemotherapy. I had limited expectations for treatment simply because the problem has been drug induced rather than of a physical root. The solitary visit did not remove the problem but there was a 50% reduction within a day.
Anyone who has suffered with tinnitus will know that it can be an uncomfortable experience so any improvement is welcome and a 50% improvement is significant.
My current visit has yielded similar results and I know have until the next cycle of chemotherapy starts to look for further improvements. That cycle will not start for 17-18 weeks, given that the current cycle has one and a half weeks to run the 6 weeks until the operation and 10 weeks recovery.
Treatment of the tinnitus is via cranial osteopathy but I always receive some standard osteopathy on my visits, which is a boon given the back problems I suffered a few weeks ago. I am now much more active than then so my back is in much better fettle generally.
The added benefit of my visits to the osteopath is that he has a wide range of experience of different treatment methods and there is substantial common ground outside the medical sphere. He is able to discuss the situation from a perspective close to mine. This offers a welcome and useful respite from the approach that I have adopted with my mainstream care, which is to educate and inform myself, so that I can have a decent conversation from their caring perspective. So, the visits have been useful in me consolidating my approach to the ever changing dynamics of situation. The overall well-being is something that is helpful in maintaining an optimistic outlook.
Whilst there is a clear cut route for me through the chemotherapy and operation each day is different and should be treated as such. My last two visits have coincided with the end of the first week of the cycle of treatment and have been of benefit in helping me out of the difficult period of the first seven days.
The Huffty's Birthday
So, my son is six today. Thanks to everyone for his lovely presents and I hope that everyone who came to his football party yesterday had a great time. The weather gods certainly smiled upon us with a glorious day and after the party we continued the jolly mood in Notoplip's and Sushi's back garden.
Today, he is in good spirits but it is unfortunate that he is not well. He now has a sickness bug and has been ill a couple of times. So, we have had to cancel his Chelsea stadium morning and we are trying to rearange it for next weekend.
From a selfish viewpoint it seems that I am being pinned in by the possibility of picking up an infection. First Boogle was ill mid-week and now Huffty.
All in all it has been an eventful morning (with my visit to A&E) but he is still pleased because we have got him a new high sleeping bed.
I guess that there is no excuse for me not to - I am going to have to join Kitten upstairs and help with its assembly. I hate DIY!!!!!!
Today, he is in good spirits but it is unfortunate that he is not well. He now has a sickness bug and has been ill a couple of times. So, we have had to cancel his Chelsea stadium morning and we are trying to rearange it for next weekend.
From a selfish viewpoint it seems that I am being pinned in by the possibility of picking up an infection. First Boogle was ill mid-week and now Huffty.
All in all it has been an eventful morning (with my visit to A&E) but he is still pleased because we have got him a new high sleeping bed.
I guess that there is no excuse for me not to - I am going to have to join Kitten upstairs and help with its assembly. I hate DIY!!!!!!
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